So, you’ve been talking to a guy for several weeks now. You started slow, but the more you get to know him, the more you start to like him. You have so much in common, and you feel like he “gets you”. In fact, you feel so good texting him that the thought slowly begins to creep in – is he the one?
And just as things between you are going great, one day, he pops the question that makes a chill run down your spine. No, he isn’t asking for your hand in marriage (yet). He asks you out on your first date together – at his place.
Don’t be quick to jump into overthinking or rushed conclusions, no matter how tempting that might be.
Sure, he might be in it only for the physical stuff and perceives you as just a fling, but there is also a chance of him being a shy sweetheart that prefers to meet you from the comfort of his home, where he feels secure.
Whether you perceive the situation – as a cynical realist or a dreamy optimist, you need to evaluate the situation objectively and decide on a game plan. That way, you can save yourself from a potentially awkward situation. Here are five tips on what to do when a guy invites you to his house for the first date.
How to prepare for a first date at his place
No matter what your man’s intentions might be, you need to prepare adequately for the date. Now, there is no telling what turns the date might take, except if you haven’t explicitly talked about that beforehand, but if you find yourself in the dark, I have five tips that can give you a good ground to stand on.
I suggest you follow all the tips, as they help paint a better picture of how to be best prepared, but if you want to skip a step or two because you find them obsolete – that is fine too.
1. Dress accordingly
This is an important one – you need to put just the right amount of effort into your outfit.
Don’t overdo it too much since you still aren’t very aware of your guy’s intentions. Just because he invited you over to his place for a first date, that doesn’t mean he just wants to sleep with you.
This is why I don’t advise wearing something too revealing as you might be going to a bar or a club. Pick something comfy yet flattering to your body type, preferably with neutral, warm, cozy colors.
Try to imagine you are going home – this has helped me multiple times to instigate a feeling of security and coziness. Also, it goes without saying – ditch the heels if you aren’t a high-heel girl in the first place. You will likely take your shoes off when you enter the apartment/house, so there’s no need to be uncomfortable to begin with.
2. Work on your hygiene
Okay, I am sure that this has passed your mind the moment he offered to cook for you at his place – how likely is it for this date to get spicy real quick? The answer is – it’s very likely.
Now, I am not saying that you will immediately rip your clothes off and jump to bed; the chances are that he just wants to have dinner and watch a movie from the comfort of his home. I have had this happen to me – true story.
However, in the case that things do get steamy at some point, you need to be prepared. Make sure you take a shower, do your usual hygiene routine, and are more than ready to get down and dirty.
And if it doesn’t happen – well, at least you’re going to be feeling yourself! Don’t be disappointed if he doesn’t put a move on you even after you did your best to look smashing. Some guys are just shy and prefer to take it slow – yes, they exist in reality, not only in fairytales.
3. Bring a compliment
You should never go to another person’s place empty-handed. Some things you might bring are wine (or any other sort of alcoholic drink) or dessert.
Better yet – ask him if you can make dessert yourself or if he wants some help with the cooking. This is an excellent way to ease the tension you both might feel and bring you closer together.
If you wish, you can also turn the night into a game night as well – bring your favorite board game so you can participate in some friendly competition. It’s perfectly okay if you get creative and decide to bring something else I haven’t listed. Just be sure that it won’t be embarrassing to him (or you) and won’t cause any awkwardness between you two.
4. Drink a shot to ease your nerves
I know, I know – you are probably nervous as hell.
Even if you are trying to brush it off as not such a big deal, it’s still quite exhilarating and stressful to go on a first date at the house of someone you barely know.
This is why I wholeheartedly suggest you drink a shot to ease your nerves. Don’t look at me like that; you know it works!
Just pick your favorite liqueur (or go straight to vodka, who am I to judge) and take a fast, steady sip. Just make sure you don’t drink too much. It’s one thing to take a shot for some courage and a whole different thing when you show up drunk at his doorstep.
If there is something that men dislike about women, it’s when they are drunk, especially on a first date. And especially at their turf. It will just make you look cheap and pitiful, so be careful with your alcohol dosage – this remains true once you get to his place as well.
5. Pack up a pepper spray – just in case
So far, we only covered happy and optimistic scenarios about how your first date at his place might go.
However, it’s worth considering that in reality, your beau isn’t Prince Charming but instead a pervy creeper that could hurt you somehow.
Hey, it’s a very real possibility – which is why you need to be prepared adequately! Just put your favorite method of self-defense in your purse – be it a pepper spray, a taser, or a safety alarm (these are quite amazing), and you will at least have some sort of peace of mind. Of course, you should only use your weapon of choice when absolutely necessary.
Still, in an age when women are vulnerable to getting molested and/or abused, it’s nice to have something you can defend yourself with.
BONUS – Have a friend call you at some point
Ah, yes, the old “bail me out” phone call. If you want an added safety net, I suggest you instruct a close friend of yours to call you at some point in the evening to check if you need a ticket out of his house. You can set up a scenario where a certain phrase means “I’m good” and another means “save me asap.” It’s up to you on how to set it up, but based on experience, I can tell you that such schemes are one of the best ways to end the date without any further explanation required.