Now, if you’re wondering how to go from casual to exclusive, that’s a different story. But we’re going to help you out and show you the best ways to take a casual relationship to exclusivity.
Who said love was easy?
1. Be clear with what you want
There are some people who date without any real idea of what they want, and that’s okay. But, if you want to make your dating experience easier, then you should figure out what you’re looking for.
Do you want to be in a relationship? Or is casual dating working out well for you? Everyone has their own needs, so whatever you choose is fine. Just be clear with the other person.
2. Take time before making a move
Some couples fall instantly in love when they casually date and decide from then on to be exclusive. But not everyone is like that. We suggest you take your time before you rush into a relationship.
Actually, get to know the person. Sure, you don’t want to be alone, but if you’re choosing partners out of loneliness, then you’re going to be lonely.
3. Be honest to yourself about the red flags
Sometimes we choose not to see all the sides of a person we’re interested in. Most people have made that mistake plenty of times, but you need to make evaluations about your potential partner.
Is this someone who’s right for you or is this someone who’s for right now? There’s a big difference between the two.
4. Can you picture the future?
When you think about you being together, can you actually see it? What would an exclusive relationship look like with them? Is it something you can see yourself being in?
It may sound lame, but if you can’t picture yourself with them in the future, then why bother becoming exclusive.
5. Put yourself first
This may sound selfish, but it’s not. When you’re thinking about the relationship, ask yourself if your needs are being met. Now, not all your needs will be met, that’s just life. But are the deal breakers manageable?
For example, if you don’t want to have kids, and they do, that’s going to be a big problem. So, you need to decide what’s good for you.
6. Bring it up lightly
If you’re confused over how long should you casually date someone, talk about it with them to understand their perspective.
This doesn’t have to be some serious conversation. If you’re feeling the time is right, why not bring it up in a light way?
If they’re not open to talking about it, you don’t need to pressure them. Back off and give them some time to think it through. If they don’t bring it up, then it’s safe to say they just want to casually date you and have no intentions of making it serious.
7. Talk to them
But have a real talk with them. If this is something important to you, you need to treat it seriously. If you’re casually dating them, what are their thoughts about the relationship? What are they thinking about you? There are two people in the relationship, and you need to know where they stand.
8. Be honest with them
If you want them to be honest with you, meet them halfway. Be clear and direct.
Don’t try to beat around the bush. They need to know how you feel about them. If you act anxiously and without confidence, it’ll make them think you’re not entirely sure what you’re talking about.
9. Leave your phone
Don’t be the person who talks about this while staring at their phone the entire time. They’re not going to take you seriously if you act like that.
Put your phone away and give your attention to them. Go somewhere you won’t feel enticed to look at your phone. Grab a drink together, go for a walk, etc.
10. Stick to what you told yourself
If you’ve decided to end the relationship if they don’t want the same things as you, then you need to stick to your decision.
Sure, they may tell you to stick around, but if you want something more and they don’t, you’re only going to get hurt. Keep to your standards and don’t change your needs.
11. Let them talk
Yes, you’ve approached them and spilled your guts, but now it’s time for them to talk to you. Who knows what they’re going to say.
Maybe they’re in love with you and want a serious relationship.
But there’s always the chance that they don’t. Regardless, you need to let them speak their mind.
12. Don’t get upset
If they don’t want the same things as you, don’t get upset. Not all relationships are meant to turn into something serious, and that’s perfectly fine. You need to accept they want different things than you and move on.
Don’t be angry at them or resent that they’re happy to casually date while you want to settle down with them. You did what you needed to do to forward in your life.
13. Think about your compatibility
Sure, you might be really excited about moving from a casual relationship to a serious one. But, don’t let your enthusiasm let you overlook whether or not the two of you are compatible in the long run.
You probably get along well right now, but do you think that you have compatible goals, values, and world views? Do you have similar religions and political outlooks? Are you both looking for the same thing, such as marriage and children someday?
These are really important questions you need to ask yourself – and your partner – in order to be realistic about whether you should get serious or not.
Hookups and casual dates are easy, but a real relationship takes a lot more effort, compatibility, and communication to succeed.
14. Evaluate the pros and cons
It might seem like a great idea to jump into commitment, but have you considered the pros and the cons? On the pro side, you enjoy the person’s company, and you would have constant companionship. And even more regular sex.
But on the con side, are you ready to give up the single life? Being in a relationship is great, but you can’t be as selfish. You have to compromise when you are committed to another person. Is that what you really want?
15. What are your real motives?
What is really driving your desire to be with this person in a committed relationship? Is it that you are crazy about them and can’t imagine them not being in your life? That’s a good reason if that’s true.
But maybe you just don’t want to be alone, and having “someone” is better than having no one. This is not a good reason. You should never enter into a relationship merely because you don’t like being lonely.
If your partner has told you they want to be exclusive, that’s great!
This is a time to celebrate. Now, you don’t have to go crazy and go wild with your social media updates! We were more hinting towards we-are-now-exclusive sex. But, ordering take-in is also a great way to celebrate the good news.
Nothing’s changed just yet, take it slow and ease into the new relationship status instead of itching to spread the word to the world. You still have time to do that!